Satya and Yoga Scandals

This is probably a post I should keep to myself. I felt strongly that there was something important to learn in my own embarrassing and less than yogic internal dialogue around a big story that broke in the yoga circles last week. I will take a dive off a cliff and share this so maybe we can talk about what goes on when we get caught up in our 'Ego' mind.


Here is how the story goes:


1. Last Friday story breaks on major yoga-related web site about allegations of not so great stuff about John Friend  (Note: I am not going to discuss them here or even provide links. If you want to find the information, it is out there in the blogosphere. This post is not about what happened and I really don't want to continue to feed any kind of gossip machine.)


2. I read the article as well as the web site that was supposedly exposing all of this stuff. I told some friends about it. I got amped up about the 'scandal.' There was a combination of shock, disdain, and then "I thought so" kind of stuff that crossed my mind. I found myself wanting to talk about it and wanting to let people know about this.


Let me set some context: I practiced Anusara yoga for many years. I know many dear people and teachers that I respect who still do. When I left this 'system' of yoga to pursue a teaching certification in Iyengar yoga, I had many reasons for doing so but the primary one was that Iyengar yoga more closely suited who I am as a person, teacher and practitioner. I had conflict for a time about this choice knowing full well that the Anusara system was on the 'rise' and more popular than my chosen path. It was cool and me standing over here in my Pune pants...well that is not cool. Staying in that system probably meant more 'success' in terms of the number of students and ' my marketability.' I  thought I did not struggle with this anymore since I have found my yogic home. Have I been waiting for something to crack in Anusara-land order to defend and armor my own choice?


Why? 


Here goes....taking a deep breath...some part of this is the story line that many of us get hooked on: See, my way of doing things IS better. Ok this ship of Anusara yoga is going to go down and we'll become the popular yoga again! My decision to pursue Iyengar yoga will be vindicated!


Isn't that what it comes down to frequently when strong judgments arise? We want to feel better about ourselves. My whole thought parade has nothing to do with John Friend or the Anusara system. But, it serves as an example of what happens when I don't examine my conditioned responses AND when I don't trust myself. The reasons for my switch were truly valid and came from my heart. That should be enough. I don't need continued proof that this was the 'right' thing to do since it so clearly IS on so many levels. Since I am big into busting my own assumptions about self right now, I chose to write about this and see if there is another way.


Yeah there is another way. I brought it up a few weeks ago in my piece about the homeless woman. We are all the same. I am John Friend and he is me. I am Manouso and Iyengar and they are me. Our external realities differ but we seek love, shelter, food and meaning. We are all 100% human. Don't judge anything until you have walked in someone else's shoes. I don't know what the hell happened with John and it doesn't actually matter. And honestly, our society spends a lot of time judging and deciding who is right or wrong. I can sit with compassion for JF and whatever pain, holes, ego-stuff put him in the center of this storm. I also feel deeply sorry for what his teachers (and the many Anusara students around the world ) must be experiencing right now. 


To put it in perspective: what if this scandal was about Iyengar? How would I feel? What kind of fear and confusion would I be dealing with? What would my response be? I would be devastated. I would be sad and shaken to the foundations. Here is this person who has been saying one thing and doing quite the opposite (HONESTLY who on this planet can't say they behave like this on a regular basis). When that gets cracked, it is hard shit.


What would serve me if this had happened to my community? Certainly no one saying things like "I told you so," "my teacher is so not like that" or "my system is better than yours so maybe you'll finally see." I would seek my community and I would do my practice.


John, like Iyengar and Manouso, is just a man. And no matter the category we put people in: Iyengar, Anusara, gay, straight, pagan, wiccan, Republican or Democrat...we all have the capacity to royally fuck up and we all the have the capacity to forgive. And on that note, there is no one 'better' way. There is the way that works for me and then the way that works for you. When the shared goal is self realization, a kinder world, healthier minds and bodies, who really CARES how we get there if the endeavor is authentic?


In this time of division and a pathological categorization of people, I am going to drop the label. I am not an Iyengar yogi. I am just a yogi. I stand in support of all teachers and students everywhere. We are all seekers. The only thing I am responsible for  is evaluating and holding accountable my own practice. The rest of what goes on is REALLY not my business and just increases the divisions that already exist.  If I am doing my own part to heal the gaping wounds of judgement and cruelty, well then what else matters?


Anyone else care to join me? "Let him who is without sin cast the first stone." - I think that's Jesus who said that